I Dunno

[k2hsharpe]

I've not long read livelife's poem "I Close My Eyes (trigger)". And Carolyn's "I See". Nina's "Once Was A Girl". Isa's "Awkward Silence". And poems by other members of this forum. Powerful words of child sexual and physical abuse, often by the very person a little girl should be most able to trust. Words of despair and struggle and fear and anger and self harm.

I wrote to livelife that I admired her strength and courage. I find this is true of all you young women. I get life as a default. Without thought. Easily. I can't begin to understand how hard the struggle must be for those of you that have to actually choose life. Whose choice for life must be a daily one. I can't begin to imagine how fatiguing at times this must be. I look at your profiles and find you are all still so very young, only as old or not even as old as my youngest child.

I seem to have blundered into your world by accident. I realize I don't really belong here. And I don't have the words to let you know how I feel about it. Except to say I so wish life had treated you all as gently as you deserved to have been treated. That I wish we hadn't failed you as badly as we did.

Carolyn, thank you so much for letting me meet your little girl, the child who never goes away. You helped me more than you could possibly know with this poem.

Kevin

[Flutterings]

Kevin your comments are always so thoughtful and lovely.

I can only ever speak for myself.

When I write I write to get it out of me, onto some paper thats not in me so the poison gets out a little.. but thats not the reason I write.

I write because I think I (hope I) am good at expressing myself, and I know that I have been through things, and learnt from things, that other people will go through, are going through.

Even if all I have to offer is 'I've been through it too and its shit' (which isnt helpful advice or anything) its something, because people know theyre not alone.

And loneliness is a killer.


Thank you for your comments hon, you don't have to be able to rhyme to write poetry, you just have to be able to work out what your trying to say..

I'm very glad you joined :hug:

[Poetic Lass]

Kevin,
I agree with Kate (Isa). I too write to let out what it plaguing me. For me though, I do it to let out the pain, the thoughts, and in a way it's the pain and broken child screaming out to be seen, it's a way I can sometimes vent these things when I can't in any other way say it or describe it.

Also, you don't have to rhyme as was said by Kate, that's not what makes the poem, it's what you are saying, describing and expressing. I do like your poetry, a lot. By the way, as you've seen I never rhyme any of my poetry, if I went by that, I wouldn't have a single poem to my name.

You've said you don't feel you fit in here, well, I know there are a lot of younger people here who write of past trauma's and pain or events. I know some of us (not naming names) have met on support forums, that may explain a bit of this. But Poetry forum is for everyone, really to think of it this is a motley crew, just some of us post poems or posts/threads more than others. I, myself am really glad you joined and I hope you stick around.

I'm also glad that one of my poems touched you and was of some help, my poems really have always been ignored most of the time I've posted, so I'm glad at least someone liked it, enjoyed it or it was helpful to someone. :hug:

Take care, Kevin.

[smorzando]

Everything has pretty much been said by Carolyn and Kate... all I can really do is say I completely agree with them on this.

smorz.

[k2hsharpe]

thank you for these responses
for making me welcome
Kevin

[Poetic Lass]

You're very welcome, Kevin! :)