Last Poster Wins

[Henry P]

I need more

[Maryd.]

Ok dear... Anything for you, my sweet.

[Henry P]

I'm waiting...

[Maryd.]

You are so impatient... ok.

You are my night in shinning armour...

[Henry P]

go on...

[Maryd.]

My reason for waking up every morning...

[Henry P]

you're improving. Please continue...

[Maryd.]

Seeing you each day makes life worth living...

(Come on, you should at least be getting weak at the knees, with that one)

[Henry P]

I have a heart of stone

[Maryd.]

Poor dear it needs warming...

Your brown eyes sparkle like stars in the sky

[Henry P]

I like that...

[Maryd.]

(This is never going to end is it... You are enjoying all the sweet talk aren't you my good sir)

Ok... Let me see...

Your lips are as soft as rose in bloom.

[Henry P]

I agree. What else?

[Maryd.]

(You are a hard man to please)

My heart bleeds for you.

[Henry P]

Why? What's wrong with me?

[Maryd.]

My dear, there is nothing wrong, just a warm, tender, caring, sweet, kind, loving man.

[Henry P]

keep going...

[Maryd.]

Soft, gentle, embraceable.

[Henry P]

I know! what else? more adjectives, please

[Maryd.]

Loveable and kissable.

[Henry P]

I like this game

[Maryd.]

I don't know how far I can go with this Henry... We may need a censored page soon.
Hahaha

[Henry P]

Just use your imagination...

[Maryd.]

Imagining your warm and tender body close to mine.

[Henry P]

Shouldn't this be on a censored page?

[Maryd.]

Ar er.. No... Nothing bad has been said yet...

Gentle whispers of sweet nothings in your ear.

[Henry P]

I like that...

[Maryd.]

Soft kisses in the moonlight.

[Henry P]

Don't let me stop you...

[Maryd.]

A gentle embrace at midnight

[Henry P]

and then?

[Maryd.]

Soft kisses...

[Henry P]

Another drop dripped from the block of ice that is my heart

[Maryd.]

Gently caressing your cheeks...

[Henry P]

caress away!

[Maryd.]

Hold you close on a cold winters night...

[Henry P]

brrrr!

[Maryd.]

Fall asleep in your arms

[Henry P]

don't fall asleep, or I'll win

[Maryd.]

Oh, but haven't you ever fallen asleep in someone's arms... You feel their heart beat and the silence of the night... The warmth of their body... Their soft skin. It's precious.

[Henry P]

not as good as winning

[Maryd.]

Well Henry... I don't know, good love is better than a good win!

[Henry P]

prove it

[Maryd.]

You're a lot of work, my good sir.

Hey, wait a minute, why must I do all the sweet talking? I think it's time you did a little...
Don't you?

[Henry P]

no...

[Maryd.]

Henry, Henry, Henry... Of course you know this means war?

[Henry P]

I'm ready for anything if I'm winning

[Maryd.]

Baby, you are going to lose, if you get into war with the master of mind control... Huahahaha

[Henry P]

I'm ready to be controlled

[Maryd.]

Best drop to your knees, my man and bow before your Godess.

[Henry P]

yes, madam

[Maryd.]

Bow before me an pray and worship me.

[Henry P]

anything you say

[Maryd.]

Now serve me...

[Henry P]

yes, boss!

[Maryd.]

I'm struggling with all this boss/bullying... It is so - not me.

First you must beg...

[Henry P]

please, madam, please....

[Maryd.]

Ar, lovely... now take my hand...

[Henry P]

Why? What will do you with it?

[Maryd.]

Do you have a hold of my hand or not?

[Henry P]

yes..

[Maryd.]

Place it where ever you wish...

[Henry P]

Steady on, my dear!

[Maryd.]

I meant, somewhere nice, my good sir... Like your heart... You need to get your mind out of the gutter.

[Henry P]

It's not easy, being a man

[Maryd.]

I think it's safe to say that in my opinion, that women will always win at these games... This has just become a gender war... Between the perfect woman... And just being a man.

[Henry P]

unless men sneak ahead like this

[Maryd.]

But women are better at everything... So we let you men lag behind.:bleh:

[Henry P]

I'll lag behind if you talk me into it

[Maryd.]

If I promise to be nice to you, will you lag behind?

[Henry P]

I give you my word

[Maryd.]

You are one of the sweetest person I have met on line.

[Henry P]

you can do better than that...

[Maryd.]

You are loving, charming, witty, intelligent, warm, tender...

[Henry P]

more adjectives, please

[Maryd.]

Sweet, adorable, sensitive...

[Henry P]

all true

[Maryd.]

I knew it... You are genuine as well. Mwah.

[Henry P]

What else?

[Maryd.]

And caring and knowing...

[Henry P]

I agree...

[Maryd.]

Feelgood, emotional, supportive...

[Henry P]

true, so true

[Maryd.]

Helpful, talented and a fantastic poet...
(Argh come on... I've definitely got the hang of it now.)

[Henry P]

No, you need more practice

[Maryd.]

Ugh!

Alright... my true friend, my rock and my hero.

[Henry P]

That'll do for today. Dream of more adjectives while you sleep. Meanwhile, I win!

[Maryd.]

Angel face... Unlucky for you, I am wide eyed and bushytailed this morning... Today is a new and fresh day... And all these adjectives you are wanting... Will have to wait until you are on. Until then, I have the upper hand. Did you expect anything less?

[Henry P]

no....

[Maryd.]

Oh, you are an angel...

[Henry P]

i know

[Maryd.]

I heard a saying in a movie once... "You are the best thing since slice bread!" You are.

[Henry P]

(sighs, too modest to reply)

[Maryd.]

:zipped: Has no come back.

[Henry P]

What do you mean?

[Maryd.]

Not you... I meant me... I am lost for words now. Oddly enough... I am never lost for words... I should stand up, shake and sit back down again and see if it is just a passing faze.

[Henry P]

Talk me out of wanting to win

[Maryd.]

I got up and shook, but nothing comes to mind...

Ok, let's talk food...

if you give up your status, I will serve you, a piece of my famous cheesecake...

[Henry P]

Tell me how you make it

[Maryd.]

Oh... I cheat... I buy the packet stuff, but double the quantity. For the topping I blend the cream myself and add strawberries, topped with chocolate flake and sprinkle it with icing sugar... Dusting the strawberries, so it looks neatly done. I am not a cheesecake fan, but everyone always asks me to bring it at parties and to buy one ready made here is $32 (and its small). I make it for $8.

[Henry P]

Sounds yum to me. What else is a speciality of yours?

[Maryd.]

Lasagne. Now with that, there is no cheating. We were taught the traditional way. It's a lot of work... But one piece of that and your mouth water... You'll be letting me win with that one.

[Henry P]

Not untilI get the full banquet

[Maryd.]

Alright dear, what is your idea of a full banquet?

[Henry P]

at least 15 courses, like at a Chinese wedding.

[Maryd.]

Wow Henry... You don't ask for much.

Ok, what are the courses?

[Henry P]

Er... some sort of soup first

[Maryd.]

Pumpkin, is that ok with you... My pet.

[Henry P]

Yes, but make it with proper stock and no cream

[Maryd.]

Anything for you my good sir. Your next request is...

[Henry P]

a light starter, without meat or fish (they come later)

[Maryd.]

What a bout a platter of fresh hams and prusciutto and possibly some pickles or gherkins, with crackers and dip?

[Henry P]

Italian antipasti? Sounds good

[Maryd.]

Henry, are you sure you are not Italian?

What next?

[Henry P]

Yes. I'm nearly 100% Polish, with a touch of Tartar on my mother's side. You can see my mum on this forum if find a poem called Iwye
Next, a pasta dish

[Maryd.]

Oh, well, I don't have a problem with that. A small portion of old fashioned lasagne, served with a small amount of Italian rice.

[Henry P]

next a fish course (or seafood) avoiding any ingredients you've already used

[Maryd.]

a small flake, seasoned with garlic and cooked in white wine and butter, served with a small amount of steamed vegies... including baby carrot, cauliflour and asparagus spears

[Henry P]

What's a flake?

[Maryd.]

Oh, I had to read up on it... I thought it was universal, but it isn't it is an Australian term for shark or Guumy sharK.

[Henry P]

Any other fish in your freezer?

[Maryd.]

You choose and I buy. My aim is to please...

[Henry P]

I've heard that barramundi is good
(i'll cook you an eclectic multi-dish feast afterwards)

[Maryd.]

(Ok now you really are my best friend)
Barramundi it is.
Ok, now what would you like for the next dish... Wait don't tell me duck... No, no... I can't cook duck... I'll leave that for your dish.
I think a big fat juicy steak is in order, what do you think?

[Henry P]

Medium done with garlic butter?

[Maryd.]

Ok... With that I shall serve you a deliecious Ceaser salad and sauted onion and mushroms, with mash potato...

Are you pleased, so far?

[Henry P]

Very. it's time for dessert...

[Maryd.]

I could serve you my famous cheescake... But I would rather serve your favourite desert...Do tell.

[Henry P]

The cheesecake will be fine, but with ripe peaches?

[Maryd.]

Yes... My fave.

Ok cheesecake with home blended fresh creem. With a circular row of ripe peahes, placed neatly around the edges of the cake, covering the middle complete with crumbed chocolate flake and sprinkled with icing sugar. Mwah.

[Henry P]

sounds delish, but now I'd like a fine cognac to conclude my feast

[Maryd.]

I shall serve you a fine cognac in a crystal glass, brought to you on a silver platter with an afterdinner mint and sit beside you and watch you drink and smile. Knowing that I have pleased.

[Henry P]

My turn to entertain you.
Have you chosen your first course, madam?

[Maryd.]

Soup of any kind. Surprise me.

[Henry P]

wild mushroom, made with real stock and a touch of cream?

[Maryd.]

Fabulous... I love mushrooms. I am pleased... Go on... I wish to have something French , just a hint for the next dish.

[Henry P]

Would Madame like ze griddled asparagus avec truffle butter and basil?

[Maryd.]

Oh, I just love that accent. Yes please.

[Henry P]

Perhaps a pasta dish to please madame?

[Maryd.]

Oh yes please, anything that I can spread parmesan on... I do hope you can produce something amazing.

[Henry P]

perhaps dee spinach and ricotta ravioli con butter e parmigiano?

[Maryd.]

It's getting warm here...

Once again you have managed to please.

[Henry P]

I think a fish or seafood course would be suitable next.

[Maryd.]

Oh, yes, please sir... Impress me.

[Henry P]

How about sea bass with a few scallops in a beure blanc with a crisp green salad?

[Maryd.]

Henry... This is a dream come true.. I may have to offer the last post to you if you manage to win me over with a stupendous desert. You better deliver, my good sir.

[Henry P]

I was going to ask you for the meat course of your choice first, madame

[Maryd.]

Well, it would have to be mild, or at the most be slightly vegetarian... I'm not a grand lover of meat. So I leave it to your discretion.

[Henry P]

then it would have to be escalope of veal fried in butter with lemon and garlic, finished with a herby white wine sauce
the vegetables of your choice?

[Maryd.]

We really like our Garlic, don't we Henry... Vegies ha? Now let me see. Love brocolli, brussel sprouts maybe some snow peas and mash potato. If you can manage it?

[Henry P]

of course, my dear. and for dessert, madame, perhaps some tiramisu, my own recipe with black cherries?

[Maryd.]

Oh, sounds delightful. Will all this be served with a sweet red wine... I do love my sweet wines, but not too sweet though.

[Henry P]

The finest wines, my dear, but perhaps you would also like a cheese board?

[Maryd.]

Oh, yes please, will gruyere be included?

[Henry P]

gruyere, a fine blue like gorgonzola, Spanish manchego, a fine English wensleydale, with grapes and crisp celery

[Maryd.]

ooh, grapes... Hmm Henry a fine meal indeed.

[Henry P]

Coffee to finish , and perhaps brandy or liqueurs?

[Maryd.]

A lovely liqueur thanks.

[Henry P]

Have you tried Amaretto, madame?

[Maryd.]

Ooh, no, what is it like?

[Henry P]

A sweet Italian liqueur flavoured with almonds and apricot kernels. Highly recommended

[Maryd.]

Nothing but the best... Yes?

[Henry P]

For you, madame, the very best

[Maryd.]

I am so close to surrendering...

[Henry P]

what else does madame desire?

[Maryd.]

Just your company

[Henry P]

And I yours

[Maryd.]

Well... That did it... You win. I surrender unto you.

[Henry P]

So I win!

[Maryd.]

:zipped:

[Henry P]

Are you conceding?

[Maryd.]

Ok... I let you win that one... Smoothie... Just because you can cook up a storm. But your lady has returned. Sorry, it's in a woman's nature to change her mind.

I win.

[Henry P]

No you don't. I need to try a new tactic

[Maryd.]

Women love a man who can look after her. Not just with food. I'm sure if you put your mind to it, you will think up a storm...

Until then - I win.:bleh:

[Henry P]

So I can win if I look after you?

[Maryd.]

Yes..

[Henry P]

I will never let you out of my sight

[Maryd.]

because...

[Henry P]

I want you to feel safe and protected

[Maryd.]

How will you do that, sir?

[Henry P]

I will be there if you are lonely or sad or scared

[Maryd.]

Aww, so cute...

[Henry P]

and cheer you up and listen

[Maryd.]

Will you listen Henry... Will you really? Or are you just saying you will?

[Henry P]

I will, I promise

[Maryd.]

And what else?

[Henry P]

I'll tell you how nice you are when you're feeling miserable and make you laugh

[Maryd.]

You are so close...

[Henry P]

I'll always be close

[Maryd.]

Will you???

[Henry P]

You know I will

[Maryd.]

I believe you... But, I hunger for more.

[Henry P]

I will comfort and console you

[Maryd.]

Day or night?

[Henry P]

Both.

[Maryd.]

Everyday...

[Henry P]

every day

[Maryd.]

"Sigh"

What about hugs?

[Henry P]

Hugs whenever you need or want them

[Maryd.]

:blub:

[Henry P]

Ah, you need a hug now. Here it comes! Can you feel it?

[Maryd.]

Yes... Feeling it... Thank you. Mwah to you.

[Henry P]

I'm glad you feel better

[Maryd.]

Don't like to sound selfish... But am feeling a little sad... Please cheer me up, sir.

[Henry P]

What did God say after creating Man?
I can do better.

[Maryd.]

Awww, that deserves the biggest:hug:

Some men really rub me up the wrong way...

But not you my good sir. You know exactly what to say at just the right time... Thanks. You have brightened my day. Mwah to you...

Does this mean I am to surrender my post to you? And you are to :1st:?

[Henry P]

I don't know what to say to my wife and the b*tches who interview me, though.
But I will be champion here if you give in now

[Maryd.]

You see Henry, this is what's wrong with the world these days. Women just don't appreciate a good man. Your Mrs and the 'you know what's' who interview you, don't know what they are missing. Stay sweet.

Surrendered...

[Henry P]

Thanks, my dear

[Maryd.]

:blub: Now that you won, we don't play this game anymore.

[Henry P]

Unless you want another chance

[Maryd.]

Are you into giving people another chance?

[Henry P]

I am with you

[Maryd.]

Ok then how would sir like to be seviced... A good meal... A good story... A...?

[Henry P]

Let me think...

[Maryd.]

Tell me on my next visit...

[Henry P]

OK....

[Maryd.]

Hmmm... hmmm, waiting, waiting.

[Henry P]

Let me tell you a story

[Maryd.]

Ok... I'm listening...

[Henry P]

Once upon a time there was a middle-aged retired teacher...

[Maryd.]

Oh, yes... like the sound of this already. I love retired teachers.

[Henry P]

He thought he'd be happy when he stopped teaching.

[Maryd.]

Yes, go on.

[Henry P]

But his daughter became ill and his wife didn't understand him...

[Maryd.]

I'm on the edge of my seat, sir.

[Henry P]

He looked for a new job but no-one seemed to want him

[Maryd.]

Oh, it is getting sad.

[Henry P]

It gets sadder still.
His wife suddenly stopped speaking to him

[Maryd.]

hmm...

[Henry P]

But he still had his daughter to talk to. then someone else came along...

[Maryd.]

Oh, the suspense is killing me.

[Henry P]

he befriended someone on Poetryforum.co.uk

[Maryd.]

Oh, oh, who??

[Henry P]

this lovely lady with black hair and nice legs

[Maryd.]

Oh, oh... do I know her?

[Henry P]

I'm not sure. I mean the one with two kids and a spaniel who is always outside painting her house . she lives in north Melbourne

[Maryd.]

Well you are almost close... It's a suburb north of Melbourne.
Nope she doesn't come to mind...

[Henry P]

You know who I mean- the one with a Nissan car who runs an online editing website, whose kids are musical and artistic

[Maryd.]

I think I am getting a clearer picture, now Henry. But I need just one more.

[Henry P]

The one who just put on a dinner party for some friends and didn't say what she gave them to eat, the one who stays up talking to me

[Maryd.]

The one who did a barbie, cous cous with garlic and ceaser salad. Plenty of sweet white wine... Brown Brothers Spat Lexia. With a lovely chocolate cake that the guest bought.

And yes she does like to stay up late talking to you...

I think it is, hmm, now let me see.

I have to go to bed. I will tell you tomorrow. Night, my good sir.

[Henry P]

What is Splat Lexia?

[Maryd.]

Its a sweet fruity wine.

[Henry P]

Shall I continue my story?

[Maryd.]

Oh, yes please.

[Henry P]

OK.
Well, this lady made the teacher feel that he had a friend even when his wife was being a hermit and his daughter was out of the house

[Maryd.]

Ooh, yes... go on...

[Henry P]

she listened to him and always knew what to say

[Maryd.]

She sounds like you, my good sir.